You have curls. Doesn’t matter the gender. You have wonderful curly hair that does not behave in a wonderful way. Maybe you have loose, tendril like curls that refuse to cooperate. Maybe you have tight, springing curls that are so fragile that they break if a strong breeze goes through them. Maybe you are the victim of the succulent Jew Fro and have no where to turn. Perhaps you have a child that screams unholy chants the moment you have a comb in your hand and declare that the ‘Fro Haz Gotta GO!’

Take heart. The Curl Vs Man struggle is ancient, but it’s not undefeatable. All you need are the right tools and ‘know how’ for taming the Wild Wild Curl Beast.

Why Would I Want To Tangle With The Curl Beast?

Perhaps you’ve befriended the Curl Beast and let it do its ‘thang’. Perhaps you are tense, silent allies; it spit out your comb as tribute and you only wash and condition so it won’t attack nearby villagers. Perhaps you took a yoga class and decided that along with adopting a gluten-free lifestyle, you also want to grow dreadlocks so you can be one with nature.

Either way, you must gird your loins and face the Curl Beast. Ignoring it will only cause infinite amount of tangles, knotting and future breakage that will either force you to cut it off and start the curl madness again or, worse, cause baldness from the knots constantly tugging at the root of your follicles.

So How Can I Tame The Curl Beast?

Step 1: Always Attack Curls When Wet

Note, I didn’t express damp, as one would mist their hair with water, I mean wet, like near dripping wet. Curly hair is at is most subdued state when it is fully saturated. When washing hair in the shower, gently rake fingers through it after washing to find any hidden knots and pick them apart. Never tackle curly hair when it’s dry; it will break.

Step 2: Enter Battle With A Wide Tooth Comb. No Brushes

First rule in Curl Club is not to talk about Curl Club. Second rule in Curl Club is Invest in Wide Tooth Everything that will come in contact with your hair. Your curls are multifaceted, multi layered entities that don’t just have tangles up top, but down below as well. A wide tooth comb will help you gently detangle gently, not pull hair and make styling easier, saving you time. Brushes will pull and break hair. They were not meant for your voluptuous mane. Put them down and never speak of them again.

Step 3: Bask In Light Moisturizing Shampoos But Skip Conditioners

Everyone has their own regiment of washing, but I’ve found that light moisturizing shampoos work best for curly hair. As far as conditioners go, I’d say pass. Not only will they weigh hair down, but the extra residue from the conditioner will cause build up and that  will lead to hellacious knots that will need to be cut; instead of Conditioner…

Step 4: Do Not Fear Leave In Oils or Aruvedic Herbs

Every curly person in the world should have light oils (Coconut, Almond, Apricot) on hand for moisturizing their mop. Maybe even a little olive, or castor, oil to keep hair supple during cold weather. Not only are they natural, but they leave little residue behind after washing and condition deeper than most traditional leave-ins and wash outs.

Also, Vatika is THE BOMB. Not only does it deeply moisturize, but it detangles, softens and make your hair super manageable! I when I travel, I always take it with me and my husband loves that it makes his biracial hair easy to deal with. Get Vatika. It’s inexpensive, kills dandruff and it tames curly messes into wavey tresses. If you can’t find it online, visit any Indian grocery store; I promise you they will have it. Am I being aid to pimp Vatika? No way; it just works and I’ve been using it for years!

So. GOOD.

Step 5: Thou Shall Sleep In Silk

Despite how angry curly hair can be, it’s extremely fragile and demands to be pampered. Want to keep the tangles down and keep your head happy? Sleep with a silk pillow case or get a silk stocking cap. Cotton pillow cases will break hair since it is a fairly rough, and absorbent, material. Silk, sata and some polyesters, will retain moisture and keep hair from getting tangled.

My brand of choice is Satin Sakks; they last forever and they have various sizes for long and short curls.

Step 6: Knights, Train Your Squires

If you have kiddos, teach them to not be afraid of their hair. Let them experiment with it, be gentle during grooming time, detangle in sections and let them have a say on what style they should have. Not only will this be a great bonding moment for you, but you are prepping them to tackle their hair on their own terms. Papa Bear gets massive amounts of questions from his fellow biracial folks on who taught him how to get his head under control. Sadly a lot of biracial and Jewish parents have no idea what to do with curls except cut them off and leave their children to the hairstyle wilderness.

Don’t be that parent; learning, then teaching, young folks about their wonderful hair is not only rewarding, but not that difficult when love and patience are in play.